Live for each day!!!

I had a really significant meeting today - I don't think either of us planned it to be, or even quite knew what we were going to talk about. Problem is, I can be read too easily!!! The conversation developed and was so beneficial. It made me realise how far I actually have come in this apprenticeship and how much I have grown. I dread to think where I would be now if I had not become a Christian. I thank all those people who have enabled me to grow and kept me on my path, the people who encouraged me when I wobbled and to the remarkable people who support me constantly now - even if I do find it hard to take your compliments!!! It dawned on me afresh in this meeting that God never leaves you. Through the happy and sad, joyful and soul destroying, He is there holding you up, and loving you eternally. This truly amazing person I met with today - who smiles even though you know they're crying inside, gave me this utterly beautiful scripture which I want to share with you. The LO...

Tonight has been pretty emotional. I went to an evening of prayer for a very special young woman who is battling cancer. We were praying for her healing and just continued strength for both her and her family. Struggling sometimes with my own health you don't always see the 'behind the scene' work. That probably doesn't make alot of sense to many, so I will explain in more detail!!! When you are sick people always say to you "we are praying for you" or you stand with two or more people while they pray for/with you - which don't get me wrong is really amazing and encourages you. However tonight was just breath taking. Steph's family and friends and just random people who had been touched by her story, gathered and as a united front and prayed together with such emotion and truth. You have probably gathered by now that I can be quite a wimp!!! So it probably wont surprise you that I cried all night. It just bowled me over how much love and support was th...

Lou Fellingham's song "Build this house" has spoken to me so much this week. I have listened and sung it alot recently while studying Nehemiah at church. Last week we sang it to close a difficult meeting and it meant so much to different people. Today we sang it during the service and both times I have found myself crying at the beauty of the words and the deeper meaning behind them. 'To serve you is the greatest thing that I could ever do' 'Help me fan the flame which you began, and burn in me a love for you that all will clearly see' 'Unless you build this house, I am building it in vain, unless the work is yours there is nothing to be gained' Just a few separate lines from the song - but when you look deeper it is real soul crippling stuff. Even though I have heard and sung this song alot, it is moving me in a new and fresh way, the words are meaning different things. Rebuilding is so important but I, and I'm sure many others overlook the fa...

Sometimes I feel like I'm a bird with broken wings At times I dread my now and envy where I've been But that's when quiet wisdom takes control At least I've got a story no one's told I finally learned to say Whatever will be will be I've learned to take The good, the bad and breathe 'Cause although we like To know what life's got planned No one knows if shooting stars will land These days it feels naive to put your faith in hope To imitate a child, fall backwards on the snow 'Cause that's when fears will usually lead you blind But now I try to under-analyse Is the rope I walk wearing thin? Is the life I love caving in? Is the weight on your mind A heavy black bird caged inside? Whatever will be will be take The good, the bad and breathe 'Cause although we like To know what life's got planned Thing like that are never in your hands No one knows if shooting stars will land A G Peterson 1997

This morning I helped with the older youth group and we were talking about Hope. The meaning of Hope future, past and present and I just wanted to share some of the things these teenagers said to describe Hope. ~ Hope gives a purpose to living ~ ~Hope is putting faith into a posibility ~ ~ Without Hope what is the point? ~ It was said this morning that in reality we live in a broken world with not much Hope. We have illness, death and false hopes. So lets try to offer other people the hand of Hope, in true faith that our God will help us to bring hope back, into this broken world.

If you can find beauty in the colors of a small flower, then you still have hope. If you can find pleasure in the movement of a butterfly, then you still have hope. If the smile of a child can still warm your heart, then you still have hope. If you can see the good in other people, then you still have hope. Hope puts a smile on our face when the heart cannot manage. Hope puts our feet on the path when our eyes cannot see it. Hope moves us to act when our souls are confused of the direction. Hope is a wonderful thing, something to be cherished and nurtured, and something that will refresh us in return. And it can be found in each of us, and it can bring light into the darkest of places. NEVER LOSE HOPE!

I stumbled across these lyrics in a song by Westlife - they really blew me away. Although its not a Christian song it spoke volumes. 'A fragile heart was broken before I don't think it could endure another pain But there's a voice from deep inside of you That's calling out to make you realize..... Don't let your past destroy what comes tomorrow'

I have had a slightly gloomy day today - its been tough. But I came across this picture with its brightness and colour which really cheered me up and made me smile. So I thought I would share it with you, enjoy!

Today we had the first of the Christmas services for one of the groups that meet at the church. It was a real honour to be invited and approached to sing for them. It was a really lovely gathering and someone I have known since my primary school days was speaking. Although I have heard June speak so many times before I don't actually think I have never really listened - probably because this was the first time I have heard her speak since becoming a Christian and secondly I haven't heard her speak for around 8 years. She spoke with a real gentleness yet conviction and her words were so powerful. She was talking to us about Jesus being the light of the world and the light in our lives. She used this really helpful illustration for it. When we are without Jesus we are in total darkness, darkness envelopes our being. Because we are in darkness we cant see the way before us and if we are being honest that really scares us. However when we take Jesus into our life He becomes our to...

Today we put up the church Christmas decorations which was so comical, we had such a giggle and really enjoyed ourselves. It wasn't until I got home that it sank in - it is almost Christmas. Can you believe that we are already in December? Chris and I led our last youth cell till 2008 this evening and it was hilarious with the kids. They are just the greatest bunch of young people anyway, but playing games such as twister with them was just side splitting! Talking to them about Christmas and this time of year was just so thought provoking, they say what the usual teenagers say (actually what the majority of people say!) how they're looking forward to the food, presents and dressing up, on the other hand just simple comments like 'I am looking forward to the carol service', 'I am looking forward to spending time with my family' and 'I am looking forward to spending time away from the commercial Christmas' (how huge is that for a 13 year old to say!!!) Com...

At the end of October I got baptised, it was one of the most amazing things I have done in my life. And it was such a priviledge to share that time with some really special people. Today I decided to look through my memory boxes, just to reflect on different things like my trip to America, my grandparents and my young childhood. I had a look through the memory box for my baptism and came across some words that someone gave to me at my baptism and just felt the need to blog them to you. The first is the story of the Prodigal daughter. This postcard reads: This is the story of the prodigal daughter - it should really be called the running father who waited everyday for his girl to come home. The daughter who had rejected him so badly. But when he saw her from a long way off, he ran to her and hugged her and kissed her. The second is a version of Psalm 23 written by Hilary Creed: The Lord is everything to me And I am content with Him He carries my burdens and gives me rest He refreshe...

After my little depression slot today!!! I have had the most amazing couple of hours. You know when work just totally goes your way, everything you need to do gets done quickly and with ease and people just co-operate with you fully! Then I just chatted to the most amazing lady who's departing words to me were "just hold on in there, God knows your heart and the plans He has for you are just stunning". How beautiful are those words. I hadn't even discussed me with her at all, I hadn't spoken about myself or my emotions; she may not even realise what that comment meant. But it has just spoken volumes. It has really refreshed my mood! Don't you love people like that?

I have really struggled today. Couldn't tell you why, don't really know myself. I don't really even know what I have been struggling with. I have just had that real sense of being alone. I have been missing my nan so much recently. Missing her smile, her love and just really her companionship - it has been really tough. She always knew what to do in a problem or when I am in a state, she just had all the advice anyone would need to know. My Nan was a really amazing woman. We all took the mick out of her because of her stubborn ways and hilarious mannerisms - but we loved her nevertheless. She would have done any thing for anyone, no questions asked and no need to explore any further. The one good thing about my Nans death, is that she died knowing Gods love and saving grace. So I can live self-assured and content that one day I will meet her again in a better place. Until then I will fondly remember her for the amazing woman she was xxx

You know when you have that feeling of just being completed deflated?!?!? I felt like that tonight (Thurs). Although I loved every second of work it had been long and tiring, I was truly shattered. And you know when you look in your diary and just think please Lord let my eyes be deceiving me and please don't say I have a 7:30pm meeting I just really cant handle it, not tonight! Instead of my eyes playing tricks the diary was correct and I went to the 7:30pm meeting really not in the right frame of mind for anything. Whist in this anti-social state this amazing truly spirit filled group of 12 or so people started our meeting off with the most humbling worship. So much so I was fighting back the streams of tears that were just flowing down my face. I was unable to get my words out. I was in such awe of what an amazing Lord we have, and to think that I was previously complaining because I was tired and felt groggy and just really wanted to go home. It is like I had completely forgott...

Yesterday I blogged about who we are and about journeys, since then it has been brought to my attention that continuously looking forward isn’t necessarily always helpful. To most people that may sound obvious, but to me it hasn’t been! I often focus on what I want to become, where I want to be in so many years and what I need to do to get there? I always felt that letting bad experiences or things from the past (whether good or bad) have some bearing on your judgements would be a bad move. I felt they must be locked away safely where no one could get to them as they are in the past for a reason. I now believe I was wrong in thinking this; obviously you can’t let your past dictate what you do now, but it can help you to become a better well-rounded person. I am reminded that God is the same; yesterday, today and forever. Sometimes locking your past away and not dealing with it, can be more detrimental than working through that past whether it is hurtful or joyous. Praise God that He h...

For the last couple of days many people have been asking me who are you? Where are you going after this stage in your life? I have so far been managing to muddle my way through these questions - but how long am I actually going to mange to carry on muddling through? Who scripture says I am is simple, it is who I allow myself to be that isn't!!! When I was 5 I had a real plan of what I was going to be when I was older, what I was going to learn, who I was going to be friends with and what I would never do........these have all changed and not been followed. Now I have no clue what tomorrow will bring for me, let alone the next 15 years. To me at a young age this would have been devastating! Everything had to be planned out thoroughly and stuck to, right down to the tiniest detail. Now at the age of 20 I am on such an adventure, not knowing what is around every corner can be really exciting but also very daunting. What it all concludes to in the end, is that my life can not be plann...

When my alar m went off this morning at 5:45 I was not impressed at the thought of clambering out of warm, cozy bed to the cold, wet world facing me outside my bedroom door! However I managed to force myself into a state of consciousness and get to early morning prayer by the unearthly hour of 6:30 am. When there, my sleepy state was rudely awoken by the text that lay in front of me. "Tell God that you want to love him as he desires you to 'Let you will be done in my life Lord' ". We also focused on Hosea 6:6 'I don't want your sacrifices - I want your love; I don't want your offerings - I want you to know me' both of these statements really challenged me. Do I know God as well as I should do? Do I spend enough time in His word and in prayer to intensify and deepen that relationship with Him? My head has been buzzing from thoughts, ideas, concepts and dreams since reading this a couple of hours ago; I know that I have got a lot of things to journal, pr...

In Courageous Leadership there is a chapter called 'The Art of Self Leadership'. It is the most mind blowing chapter of a book I have ever read in my life - I have read it over and over again and each time I get something new out of it. This is a segment from this chapter it is from Rory Noland's song "holy spirit, take control" 'Holy Spirit, take control. Take my body, mind and soul. Put a finger on anything that doesn't please you, Anything I do that grieves you. Holy spirit, take control'

I had a check-up at the Royal Brompton Hospital in South Kensington this morning and God is just so amazing!! I promise it hasn't taken me this long to realise it but today just confirmed it even more to me. I have been dreading this appointment for a while and have made myself so panic-stricken over it, but it all went so well. Results didn't completely go my way but Gods healing hand is so present in this disease and He is just so awesome. His power just leaves me and my Mum awestruck every time I leave the hospital, it also leaves the doctors amazed at the miraculous recovery I am constantly making. It truly confirms to me the verse in John 10:10 "the thief comes to steal, kill and destroy, but I come so you may have life and life to the full". Thank you Lord!

I received this is an email today and rarely pass these things on, but actually I like it and it is quite fitting for the lovely friends I have. Even if a period of time passes - whenever one of us gets back in contact with the other we carry on as we left off, and that's friendship - I always know you are there if ever I needed a true friend. A young wife sat on a sofa on a hot humid day, drinking iced tea and visiting with her Mother. As they talked about life, about marriage, about the responsibilities of life and the obligations of adulthood, the mother clinked the ice cubes in her glass thoughtfully and turned a clear, sober glance upon her daughter. 'Don't forget your Sisters,' she advised, swirling the tea leaves to the bottom of her glass. 'They'll be more important as you get older. No matter how much you love your husband, no matter how much you love the children you may have, you are still going to need Sisters. Remember to go places with them now an...

I have been reading this book now for a couple of weeks and every time I turn another page I am intrigued by the amazing gems of wisdom that leap out at me 'The Local church is the hope of the world' is just one comment that he repeats constantly in the first few pages and although I have heard that saying so often, the way he skilfully writes about this just moves me to the brink of tears. How can we as Christians sometimes overlook that fact? It makes me ponder how highly to I regard my Church, when I get ready to go whether on a Sunday, or during the week, do I actually realise what this place is? THE HOPE OF THE WORLD!! That is a massive deal!!!! Words cannot explain how important any church is - I feel that we are all worried about the how, what and where and not the why of the church. We are there to worship our God, the Lord of Lords and King of Kings. We're there to honour Him, His majesty, greatness, unconditional love and amazing forgiveness to us all. It just mov...

I have been extremely laxed at blogging and when I opened this blog thought it was an amazing idea - which it was. However I was not dedicated to it and gave up almost immediatley. I have now decided that if you start things you must carry on and see things through to the end Welcome to my new blog!

I have been sitting here just wondering, thinking and dreaming.......... Wondering what the future will hold Thinking about all the things I wish to cram into each day Dreaming about what I could be and what I could do But I have realised, it is not up to me but is all in God's hands. He plans every day of my life. He has my route completely planned out for me and I need not worry because He will keep me safe I just hope and pray I can fulfill the tasks that He may lay in front of me. I will place my trust, love, my whole being into His hands, as I love the Lord and will trust him until I take my very last breath

Footprints in the Sand One night a man had a dream. He dreamed he was walking along the beach with the Lord. Across the sky flashed scenes from his life. For each scene, he noticed two sets of footprints in the sand: one belonging to him, and the other to the Lord. When the last scene of his life flashed before him, he looked back at the footprints in the sand. He noticed that many times along the path of his life there was only one set of footprints. He also noticed that it happened at the very lowest and saddest times in his life. This really bothered him and he questioned the Lord about it. "Lord, You said that once I decided to follow you, You'd walk with me all the way. But I have noticed that during the most troublesome times in my life, there is only one set of footprints. I don't understand why when I needed you most you would leave me. " The Lord replied, "My son, My precious child, I love you and I would never leave you. During your times of trial and s...